Sister Bonnie Oscarson, American Fork Utah West Stake Women's Conference, February 2016

  Discover the Divinity Within

Confidence to Live the Lord’s Commandments

Sister Bonnie Oscarson, Young Women’s General President

American Fork Utah West Stake Women’s Conference

February 9, 2016

·       The doctrine that we are literal daughters of our Heavenly Father and that each of us has a divine nature and unlimited eternal potential is one of our most unique and beloved doctrines. We sing it, we repeat it, and we teach it almost daily.

·       Why do we as women seem to struggle with this principle [of self worth]? We seem to have no problem believing that every other woman around us is a beloved daughter of God, but we have a hard time seeing ourselves as capable, dependable, or even good enough. We tend to compare our worst faults with others’ best characteristics!

·       What is the answer? How can we begin to allow ourselves to see ourselves as God sees us?

Too many of us are taking our clues about who we are from the wrong source. We are looking to the world to tell us if we are good enough. We are surrounded by movies showing impossibly skinny and glamorous actresses with flawless skin and million dollar smiles.  We pick up magazines that show models who have been electronically slimmed down, elongated, and airbrushed to point they would have a hard time recognizing themselves. We spend time online looking at Instagram, Pinterest, and other social media sites in which our friends put only their best and most cheery foot forward and we compare the reality of our lives with their rosy postings of perfection. No wonder we sometimes feel we are somehow lacking or can never measure up to the standards we feel the world has set for us as young women, sisters, women, and mothers.

What I am concerned about is the balance in our lives of the kind of messages that tell us who we are. Too often we are taking cues about our abilities, our worth, our potential for doing good completely from social media and we are not balancing it out with messages from our leaders.

“We need women with the gift of discernment who can view the trends in the world and detect those that, however popular, are shallow or dangerous.”

Today, let me add that we need women who know how to make important things happen by their faith and who are courageous defenders of morality and families in a sin-sick world. We need women who are devoted to shepherding God’s children along the covenant path toward exaltation; women who know how to receive personal revelation, who understand the power and peace of the temple endowment; women who know how to call upon the powers of heaven to protect and strengthen children and families; women who teach fearlessly.

…we need women who have a bedrock understanding of the doctrine of Christ and who will use that understanding to teach and help raise a sin-resistant generation. We need women who can detect deception in all of its forms. We need women who know how to access the power that God makes available to covenant keepers and who express their beliefs with confidence and charity. We need women who have the courage and vision of our Mother Eve.”

Do you recognize the words of President Russell M. Nelson from last October’s Conference talk, “A Plea to My Sisters”?

·       Balance the sources of your messages that you allow to come into your life each day. We choose what we let into our minds and hearts. Take time daily to read from the scriptures, to listen to a conference talk, or read the Ensign. Look for the messages which our Heavenly Father has for you. He wants you to understand these things about yourself.

·       The greatest evidence which we have that we are valued, loved, and cherished by our Heavenly Father, is His Son Jesus Christ. He sent his beloved and perfect Son to live in this sin-filled world as a mortal man, to lead the way by His perfect example, and most of all to suffer unimaginable pain for each of us. Jesus Christ atoned for our sins. And Heavenly Father allowed His Son to die for you and for me. That same Son would three days later, overcome death and become the first person to be resurrected so that WE could someday overcome death and live with our families forever. 

What greater evidence is there in the universe that God loves and values each and every one of us than the gift of His Son Jesus Christ to the world?

·       Once you know you are an eagle, will you ever be content to scratch in the dirt eating bugs with the other chickens? You were each born to succeed not fail.  You were each born to soar and be a shining example to those around you. You were each born to attain greatness—not according to the definition of the world, but according to the how your Heavenly Father defines greatness. 

·       It just happens to be our youth theme this year: 2 Nephi 31:20:

“Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life.”

·        Greatness and worth in the eyes of the Lord has more to do with obedience, love of God and our fellowman, service, scripture study, prayer, understanding the Atonement and making it function in our lives, and doing all these things steadfastly—throughout our lives. It has nothing to do with social standing, wealth, our physical attractiveness, or worldly success.

·       We are motivated to do all these things, to keep trying and to exercise faith in the Savior, in the prophet, and in the organization because we know who we are and what is at stake for ourselves and for our families. We understand our identity, our place in the Father’s plan for us, and we know what we are supposed to do.

·       Why is it so hard to always make good choices about how we spend our time, what we read or watch and how we treat one another?

Because the world is full of distractions!!

1. Temptation. The world is loud, flashy, appealing, it looks like everyone is having fun, and there are no apparent consequences for behavior that we have been taught is wrong—at least in the world’s eyes.

2. Adversity: The world is also full of challenges and trials that are a part of mortal life. I don’t know of anyone, myself included, whose life has gone exactly like I thought it would. Trials are an important and necessary part of this mortal experience. We are here to learn and grow by dealing with adversity and trials. We shouldn’t be so surprised by them!

3. False philosophies of the world. We are inundated with information, with social messages, with devices that connect us to thoughts, opinions, commentary, and social interchanges---constantly! Your youth—your children are growing up in this media messaging saturated world! It is not going away and it is not going to get any easier to protect us or our families from ideas and philosophies that foster doubt rather than build faith. 

·       There has never been more of a need for quality teaching in your homes. FHE, scripture study, family prayer, taking advantage of every informal teaching moment. Your children need to understand that the answers to most of the difficult questions can be found in understanding Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness. Are you teaching your children about the plan of Salvation? Do they understand the Doctrine of Christ?

·       Teach your children to ask questions in faith, not doubt. (Marcus Nash)

• ·         Deliberate parenting. BYU Today magazine article on what things I learned while at BYU. One mother, Brooke Olsen Romney from Kaysville, wrote:

“As a mother of four wild boys, I wondered how to help them reach their potential in a world that seems obsessed with entertainment and fun. The most fulfilling relationships are not the ones based on constant fun together but ones where we have worked, laughed, loved, and struggles together.

This year, we will no longer ask our kids if they had fun. We will instead ask,

·       ‘Did you learn or create something?’

·       ‘Did you try your best?’

·       ‘Were you a good friend?’

·       ‘Did you make the world better, in even a small way?’

·       [I have learned how] to live so that each day the answer to at least one of these questions is, “Yes!” Now I want to give my kids the same gift, because that’s when life gets really fun.”   (BYU Today, Summer 2014)

All of your life you have been singing, saying, and reading, “I Am a Child of God.” Do you really believe it?

There is evidence all around you.

·       The scriptures teach us who we really are and what our relationship is with our Heavenly Father.

·       The Atonement of Jesus Christ is evidence of our worth. It was done for you.

·       Balance where you choose to receive the messages of who you are. Spend as much time in the scriptures and listening to conference message as you do online or on watching TV.

Knowing who you are, should help you make wise decisions in your life and help you know how to protect and teach your children to make good choices.

The world is full of distractions: temptations and evil, challenges and adversity, and false philosophies that lead to doubt. We have been given wonderful tools to help us keep our faith strong, keep us focused on the important things in life, and to teach and protect our children.

CHALLENGE: What is one new thought you have had this evening as you have listened that you need to put into effect in our life? Write it down. Decide what you will do about it.